Do you think that domestic violence is a common occurrence? Do you think that you would ever find yourself in an abusive relationship? Are you the kind of person who had always said you would never be in an abusive relationship, and then found yourself in one with no way out? What would you tell your friend if she were in an abusive relationship? Do you think that abuse is a learned behavior from your youth? Is there a lot of abuse in your family?
Kassi Royalty(12:00)
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23 comments:
I strongly believe that there should be much harsher punishments for domestic abuse. People that have been abused are scarred for life, and those that abuse obviously have issues. I do not think that I would end up in an abusive relationship, but I don't believe anyone thinks they would be involved in that. I have never found myself in an abusive relationship, but my best friend was married to an abuser and was completely blindsided by his actions.
I do believe that domestic abuse is a common thing in the US, unfortunately. I've seen it too many times on the news and in the paper, so I know it's out there. I myself have never been in an abusive relationship nor do I intend on being in one. If I knew someone who was in an abusive relationship I would tell them to get out of that relationship, because they deserve better than that and no matter how hard it might be to get out, they should for their own safety. I do think that abuse is a learned behavior from anytime in your life, not just your childhood. I was in an abusive family, but it wasn't a common thing. I'm not saying that it was right at all, and I had nothing to do with it, but I think that, as bad as this may sound, the abuse, physical, emotional, psychological, etc., made me a stronger person than I might have been if it did not happen.
- Jarett Crump
I don't think that domestic abuse is common in the U.S.A, but it is close. Domestic violence usually begins when both spouses start arguing with each and getting really loud. Then all of a sudden you start swearing at each other and getting all in the person's face. Thats when the abuse comes in. The women gets hit or the man gets hit and it goes on and on. In order to prevent this from happening though the man and women should talk to each other in a cool, calm, and collective voice to keep thier tempers from flaring. Don't start yelling because that isn't how grown people should handle the situation. Handle the situation like adults, sit down with one another and calmly talk about your problems with one another. At the end the day both will feel good about themsleves and the whole situation.
Jaime Carpenter
Abuse is a scary thing and is probably a lot more common than we think. Especially emotional abuse. All most people want is to feel wanted and when they find it, they will do anything to keep it. Even if that means getting abused. Its sad that people who get abused seem to kind of push it aside and think it will stop. Thats usually not the case. I have never been in a abusive realtionship and dont plan on sticking around if I get into one. If I ever know someone in one, I would do anything to help them get out of it, since that seems like the hardest part. Then I would want them to go get some help and stick it out with them. It seems like abusive behavior can be learned in youth, but I totally believe that being in that type of a situation wouldnt necessarily make you want to be abusive when your older.
Lindsay Brooks
Well there isn't any abuse in my family, and I have never been in an abusive relationship, so I don't really know what to say that can help you. I have heard of abusive relationships and they sound aweful. That isn't what a relationship is for. It is supposed to be about having a good time and loving the other person. I think that is why people saty in these relationships. They love the other so much that they look past the abuse.
Dustin Piercy (9:00)
So many thngs can constitute abuse. I knew a woman once who designated herself as emotionally abused because her boyfriend told her she was too fat. Is that really abuse, or is that a truth that might be worth hearing?
When it comes to physical abuse, there's less gray area. I'm old school about this. If a man ever hits a woman, chokes her, pushes her, or in any way takes advantage of his superior physical strength to harm a woman, that guy is not really a man and deserves a good beating from the womans friends. It takes a very weak man to use his physical strength against a woman or a child. And if a woman says she loves this man and can't leave him I would say she needs a boost in self-esteem.
Jason Horath (9:00)
I personally have never been involved in a abusive relationship, and i hope that i never am. I was fortunate to grow up in a family where abuse was not an issue. Besides, if my dad would have ever hit my mom my brothers and i would probably have killed him. I hate the fact that these relationships even occur. Being in a relationship like that has a lasting impact on people. I am sure that they probably develop some serious trust issues. Guys that abuse their girlfriends or wives should have to a experience a mirror punishment. What i mean by this is that they need to have the same thing done to them that they have done to others, maybe even worse.
Zach Burnett
I grew up with psychological abuse from my stepmother and will never deal with abuse from a girlfriend. I believe most situations can be solved or smoothed over by staying calm. I never yell or use a cutting voice, and I will only hit a man if they attack me or someone else.
It is useless to do anything for a friend who is in an abusive relationship because they will turn their back on you and go with the abusive person. They have to realize on their own that the relationship is a bad one.
People that commit abuse should be sentenced to sensitivity training, and learn how to cope with problems and anger. If someone yells at you, the worst thing you can do is get angry and yell back.
Daniel Hooker
Domestic violence is very common. I have never dealt with it, nor will I ever. If I knew that someone was abusive, I would avoid them at all costs. I've never been in a relationship so I can't answer that. I would tell my friend to make sure that they had enough evidence to charge him. If they didn't, I'd tell them to stay at my house and I'd run him off myself. I think that in most cases people who abuse were abused themselves, but some people are just messed up. I have never been abused. Sure, I got the occasional spanking, but not abuse.
Liz Doty
I like to think that it isn't, but I know that sometimes it is. I don't think that I ever would be, but you never know. If I was I would get myself out of it. I would run away. That she needed to leave him, and that the relationship wasn't worth it. With some people yes. No thank goodness there isn't abuse in my family.
Dani Evans
Domestic abuse is more common than most realize. I think that any man who puts his hands on a female in any form,(with few exeptions of violent women, because they do exist) is a coward and not a man at all. Usually an abuser does this because of his own treatment as a child or the treatment of his own mother he may have witnessed. But that doesn't mean it's ok. As adults they know right from wrong and hitting women is WRONG. I think the punishment for domestic violance is way to leaniant. I know of people who have three and four charges of hitting a woman and they get probation, or maybe a weekend in jail. Stick em in prison where they are no longer so tuff, and have no woman to comfort them and love them, but bib bubba instead. I doubt it would make a difference in the long run but it's still worth a shot.
Brett Hall 12:00
I think domestic abuse is slowly starting to become a problem in the US. To me, domestic abuse can be a variety of things. Whether it's yelling, hitting, fighting, or arguing it's a form of domestic abuse. I personally don't come from a family of physical domestic abuse, but my parents do argue. They tend to yell at eachother over money, and other stupid stuff. I don't think that's how a marriage should work. I think that the couple needs to talk about their problems in a civil manner. I don't think yelling is the proper way to overcome the problem. I think domestic abuse is completely unecessary, and I think if two people share a strong relationship this shouldn't happen.
Chelse Lindenbaum (9:00)
I think that domestic abuse happens more than people think. I myself have never been in abusive relationship nor will i ever be. I have been raised to never hit a girl. if i really feel she deserves to be hit then i dont feel that i should be in a relationship with them. My family wasn't abusive either....at all. I also don't know anybody that is in an abusive relationship but i know that there are people that are in abusive relationships and are too scared to speak up about it.
Jimmy Gourdier (12:00 class)
I could never see myself in an abusive relationship. I consider myself a pretty stong minded person, and I just don't see someone being abusive with me. I know people that have been and are abused today. Some people get out of it and some don't. I always refer to the movie 'Enough.' Which is a very good movie, one of my favorites, where a woman is abused and cheated on and they have a child together. She doesn't feel that she can just leave him because of the child, but she can't stand the mental and physical abuse she is bein put through. And not to give the movie away, but I love it so much because she knows that to have a normal life with her child and herself safe, she'll have to fight back. I think every woman (and even man) should see this movie. It's a great example of how woman should take charge, and stick up for themselves. I hope that domestic abuse stops soon, because I think it's a terrible thing and the world is already scary enough.
--Jill Reinhart (noon)
Domestic abuse is either learned or just simply hidden through other forms of childhood abuse. Some people learned it from watching their parents argue as children. And some people allow themselves to be abused because the abuser simply states how much they love them. They was not validated of this love as a child from their parents, therefore giving them a false conciousness of love. If you are in a relationship like this you need to look for a strong support system that will fill the void and allow you to move forward.
Theresa Newman(noon)
Domestic abuse is a very common thing I think. There are always lots of cases of it, and I'm sure that their are lots of cases of it that people will never hear of. Abuse is just a wrong and terrible thing. An innocent, nice child could be abused as a child and then raised into a same thing someone once did to him. I will never be in an abusive relationship, especially being the one that is abusive. When a girl is being abused in a relationship it makes me very upset because men are just naturally stronger than women period. Women can protect themselves, but more than likely the male will be more dominant in a fight. If one of my girl friends was being abused in a relationship, I would attack the guy, make him apologize, and have him leave her life. I don't think the US is home to the most domestic violence at all. There are countries out there that are just insane about this kind of stuff.
Trevor (12:00)
Domestic violence is indeed more common than most people believe. Sometimes people stay in abusive relationships for years, or their whole lifetime. I didn't realize I was in an abusive relationship until I had training in recognizing it for my job. I recognized it in my own marriage. Abusive relationships do not start out as abusive, they start out great. Abusers are masters at manipulating emotions so when they are "courting" they make one feel special and loved, then they get jealous, this is still flattering at first, then they want to isolate the other person from their family and friends, then rage and anger follow and sometimes physical violence, and attempts to control ones finances and time. They never let up and the only way to obtain any peace is to pacify them. I think these signs should be taught in school so people could recognize them before they find themselves pregnant, married, or totally isolated from their family and friends.
Laura
When I was 16, I was in a physically, emotionally and psychologically abusive relationship. Before I met this guy, I considered myself a strong person. But eventually, somehow, he started to control almost every aspect of my life...none of it was positive. I think that it could happen to anyone who doesn't watch out for the warning signs of an abusive relationship. The first sign is isolation. The abuser tries to isolate the victim so that he is the #1 and only support person in your life. After that, it's easy for the abuser to make you think you are too weak, too dumb, too fat, too unloveable and that's why everyone else has abandoned you. "I'm the only one who could ever love you." And remember, if a person stoops to the level of hitting you once, they will do it again. And maybe next time they won't stop at a slap or a punch. If a person can hit you once, they could kill you. I came from a loving family. There was no abuse in my history. I was not a rape victim. I did not have a poor self esteem (until I allowed my abuser to lower mine). I knew that being in one abusive relationship was enough for me. I decided that if I ever got rid of my abuser, there wouldn't be any more. I was very choosy after that and I have not allowed myself to be put in that situation again. I really consider myself lucky and blessed to have survived. And I would tell a friend that she was too good, too strong and too beautiful to let anyone treat her that way.
Sadly, I do believe that domestic violence is a common occurrence.I will never be in an abusive relationship. Not mentally, physically or emotionally abusive. If my friend was in an abusive relationship I would definitely tell her she needs to get out of it. No one ever deserves to be in an abusive relationship. I think that abusiveness can be learned when you are a kid, but it is not automatic. Just because your parents fight, that doesn't mean it will be you when you grow old. We are all accountable for our actions.
Ryan Lowry(7:00)
I think there is more abuse than we would like to believe, sadly. I don't think I will ever find myself in an abusive relationship. If I had a friend in an abusive relationship I would want her to know that I would be there for her and try to convince her to get out of it. As far as I know there is no abuse of any kind in my family.
Elizabeth Kerns (9:00)
I'm sure that domestic abuse is more common than people often think that it is. Many times, the woman is scared to tell anybody that she is being abused, so the number of reported occurrences is probably a lot less. I would hope that I am never in an abusive relationship, and if I were, I would sure as hell get out of it. Abusive tendencies probably do come from a person's childhood, but I don't know if there is any real way to prove that this is the case. I think that a person convicted of domestic abuse should get a pretty tough sentence, not only because it is so wrong, but because it can lead to so many different things. A person who goes through domestic abuse not only has the physical pain to deal with, but also the emotional scarring that often goes with it.
Chris Bohnhoff (Noon)
I believe domestic violence is too common everywhere. I know my husband will never do anything to harm me. I had a friend in an abusive relationship when I was in high school. It started as controlling, and became physical later. It was a horrible situation which even led to stalking, and still after a few years, constant emails. She ended up trying to tell an Aunt whose husband abused her, but the aunt refused to leave. I wish abused women knew there was a way for a better life for them.
Bobbi (9:00)
Domestic violence is more common than people think because many people fear losing their life if they report it. Nobody ever sees themselves being involved in an abusive relationship. I always said I would never let a man physically hurt me because I grew up in that type of environment. One day, my boyfriend slapped me and I couldn’t believe I was actually in that position. I was only nineteen years old when it happened and wanted to believe he wouldn’t do it again, but he did. One night he had way too much to drink and became irate for no reason. I was rocking our son in a rocking chair when he decided to repeatedly punch me in the head. When I went for the phone, he ripped it out of the wall. I tried to get outside, but he grabbed me by the hair and pulled me back inside. Thankfully our neighbors heard us and called the police. I pressed charges against him, so he went to jail. I have never felt lower in my entire life than I did when he hit me. I swore I would never allow a man to do that to me again and I haven’t. I refuse to allow a man to disrespect me in any way. Nobody deserves to be physically or verbally abused. If someone truly loves you than they would never hurt you. I do believe that abuse is a vicious cycle that gets passed down in your family, until someone decides to be the one to break that cycle. We both experienced a lot of abuse in our families.
Jennifer Wilson
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