Monday, July 17, 2006

Is spanking your kids child abuse? By Kevin Thomas






Should parents spank their kids?

When does discipline become abuse?

To what extent should accused child abusers be punished?

Thank for your response,
Kevin Thomas

22 comments:

English student said...

Spanking and abuse are very different behaviors. Hand slaps when children are very young, sometimes deters the behavior from continuing into older ages. Spanking needs to be used only after other forms of punishment have been attempted. My father would only spank when we would continue to disobey the rules that were given, or when we would not follow the other form of punishment.
When spanking becomes used as the only means of punishment, and used on an every day basis, this can be a form of abuse. Abuse is a very hard thing to prove, unless of course there are marks, or witnesses. Other forms could be being locked in dark rooms, not being fed, and there are many others. Abuser punishment is a hard issue.
My personal opinion would be to punish to the fullest extent of the law, lock abusers away for a very long time. Another good way to help, would be to fix the problem, counseling, training, and parenting classes. I hate to see children lose their parents, unless it is necessary. I do think that if they continue to abuse, they need to never see their children again, and need to go to jail. Darcy Cekander

English student said...

growing up as a child my parents used spanking as a form of disipline. When the child puts bad behavior with the idea of a spankin, hopefully causing them to stop the bad behavior. In this case i think parents should spank them. i think that spanking can be used to a certain point...when parents start spanking their kids or hitting them on a regular basis and for stupid reasons...that is when i think it becomes abuse. After reading The Lost Boy books and seeing how far some child abusers take things, i feel like people who do abuse children should be severly punished, i don't think they should be given capital punishment but i do think they should be put away for life and if not that close to it. I think they should have to sit there for that time and think about all they did to that child and how it will affect that child the rest of his/her life.

Maria Shallenberger

English student said...

I think there is nothing wrong with spanking children if it is done the right way. When a child misbehaves, the last resort is spanking. Parents should verbally warn their children and tell them what they are doing wrong, next the parents should give them some kind of stricter warning that they will be spanked if they do not behave immediately. Some parents use counting for the second warning. Once the parent gets to three or five, ane the child refuses to comply, a spanking is on order. Just one or two firm swats with enough pain to get the child to cry genuinely. If the child cries for more than a few minutes, they are just trying to get pity fromthe parents. That is when another warning should be given and the process starts over. If a parent gets any secret joy out of spanking or feels like they may be loosing control and acting out of anger, another method should be chosen for discipline.
~Adrianna~

English student said...

I see nothing wrong with spanking your child if they do something wrong. As a child I was spanked if I continued bad behavior. It teaches the child rules and disapline. Spanking becomes abuse when it is constanly repeated for no reason. When a child becomes physically harmed by their spanking. When a person/parent is accused of abuse they should be punished in a number of ways. I believe they should be put in jail for a long time then they need to go to counciling before they return to their kids if they do.
Nicole Mulrooney

English student said...

I see no problem with spanking a child if they do something wrong, I was spanked as a child many times for bad behavior, which I think helpewd me out more in life. Becasue it really made me understand wrong and right as a child.
Discipline becomes abuse when it is excessilvy repeated for no reason.
Abusers should be punished to the full extent of the law, only if proven guility and the evdience is there. They should be sent to a maxiuam security prison where they can experinceabuse first hand.
Jamie Brooks

English student said...

I think spanking should be a practised disiplinary of parents. Spanking does not usually involve abuse, abuse in my eyes is when the parent takes their punishment away from the rear. When the child comes to school black and blue on the arm and eye, Then it is abuse. When it gets this bad i think that the parent or parents should be punished serverly. The child is a person and no person disearves to be beaten to submission that is just wrong. I am not saying i am a flip flop person by saying one thing then another all i am saying is that spanking is not an abuse unless it is turning the child black and blue.
by: Ryan Duda

English student said...

I feel that spanking your kids it not child abuse. Some children need to be disiplined, physically. When you try to talk to them verbally it seems to go in one ear and out the other. A little spanky from time o time, will let the child know that you mean business. Of course, don't spank the child until it leaves a mark or bruise.

Leta

English student said...

I don't think there is anything with spanking as long as you don't do it out of total anger. You see parents who spank their kids for every little thing they do and i don't think that is right. I think spanking is fine as long as it is well deserving. Talking it through is always a better way to handle things rather than going straight for the paddle eveerytime. Kellie

English student said...

When I was younger, I would always have two options if I got into trouble: grounded or spanked. I always chose to be spanked because it was quick and painless. However, I would always laugh and say, "Is that all you got?" That wasn't the smartest thing to do because I would just get another spanking, but that's a different story. I think that some parents spank their kids for the wrong reasons at times. For example, some parents spank their young child if they spill pop on the carpeting. If the kid is too young to know any better, than the parent should say, "Oops! Let's get that cleaned up!" After all, the children might get used the being hit every time they do something wrong. This could lead to putting up with serious abuse when they get older. Parents just shouldn't take their power as adults for granted.

~*Amanda Wasowitz*~

English student said...

I think that spanking and abuse are two different things. I think that spanking is a one spank type of discipline. I think abuse is when you lose the sight of discipline and do it out of anger. I think that when you spank a child to harm them jus because is abuse. This topic is kind of a hard one for me to decide on. I think that a couple spankings is okay, but a abuse is not. I'm not really sure where I would draw the line at abuse, but if I lose the thought of discipline that is not extreme I think that I would be abusing my child.
~Ashley Ross

English student said...

I do not feel that spaking is abuse at all. Spanking a child when implemented the correct way just reinforces what the parent is saying and hopefully the child will learn to listen to words and have to have it turn to spankings.
Jamar Brown

English student said...

I think that spanking kids should be the last resort. I do think that spanking is a form of abuse. Any form of hitting, with a fist or hand, is abuse. I also think that it is a form of discipline, and gets the point across very well. I was spanked as a child and dont see anything wrong with it. It is child abuse when a person takes their bad day or problems out on a child. The person should also be punished when they go overboard and leave marks on the child. Aaron Royse

English student said...

yes, i believe that spanking should be allowed in the home just as long as it is for a good reason and not repitive for a long period of time and only use your hand and nothing else.

I was a good kid my parents have always told me. there is only one time that i remember being spanked, my father had asked me to turn up the radio and i slammed the glass door to the entertainment stand, as i turned away the word shit came from my mouth. whoops!!!

as a child of a marine, you quikly learn how to act otherwise you can get it where the sun don't shine.

you must know when a child sould be spanked. maybe you should do it after he/she has cursed repetivly,and not for peeing the bed. thanx audrey

English student said...

This topic really gets to me. I think spanking is a very effective form of discipline. It should, though, only take a few times if the parent is punishing their child correctly. What I am trying to say is that the parent should not need to spank their kids four times a day. Also, this is not the only method of discipline; it should be used along with other actions as well. Also, I think spanking can become abuse if the child is older. Spanking is generally used for toddlers and is only enough to make the child think and know what they did was wrong. Child abusers should be thrown in jail in my opinion. They have no right or reason to be abusing thier children, whether its emotion, verbal, or physical. It kills me to see kids in a family where I think that a parent could be abusive. I just want to reach out and help those kids.
Excellent topic
Rebecca Carmack

English student said...

Parents should only spank their children in rare instances. Eventually, the kid is honestly going to become immune to such punishment and keep up the mischief. When spanked, a child should know that what "it" did was unacceptable and should never be done again.
Whenever a child experiences bruising or mental trama, discipline can definitely be abuse.
Child abusers should be heavily fined and receive treatment for their problematic emotions. Jail would not be appropriate in most cases since jail doesn't provide inmates helpful therapy.
-Michael Holmes

English student said...

Spanking a child should be a last resort, and technically spanking is abuse. People who put it in the same category as discipline should be spanked again and tell me how it disciplines and restrains them.

Corey

English student said...

If a parent feels justified in spanking their child, then they should. Although, immediatly following a spanking, or any punishment for that matter, they need to talk to the child and let them know what it was that they did wrong and why they're being punished.

I think abuse sets in when you spank your child every day over minor things such as spilling juice on the floor or tracking mud into the house.

Punishment against accused abusers varries on how bad the abuse is. I would trust the courts in whatever judgement they see necessary.
Pat Mahoney

English student said...

I was spanked as a child and all it did was spark fear in me instead of teaching me the so called lesson. There are so many different ways to discipline a child instead of hitting them. All options should be tried before raising a hand to a child. Physical violence is never acceptable in any form.

Hannah Greenberg

English student said...

I do not believe in spanking. There are so many other ways to handle a situation. Talking to children is always the best choice because we teach them how to handle situations and how to control their emotions. Some children are very strong willed. I know from experience, that the parent must have control of their child when they are little, or you will have a disaster in the teen years. If all other forms of discipline fail, you may have to spank.

Robbin Russell

English student said...

I guess the question for me would be "Do you want to teach your children that violence is a solution in some cases?" It just makes sense that if you spank your kids you are teaching them that physical punishment is okay, at least in some cases. I'm not necessarily going to call that right or wrong, as I have to acknowlege this is sometimes the case, but I do believe that there is always a better option than physical violence, even if the results aren't as dramatic or immediate. I don't have any kids so I can't pretend that I know what it's like trying to deal with a little problem child; maybe my mind will sway either one way or the other if I ever end up in that situation.

James Koltz

English student said...

Hi, Kevin. I'm against spanking across the board (or WITH a board, for that matter). I don't think physical contact is ever the best lesson. I think spanking often sends the wrong message. The message might be, "When all else fails, it's okay to hit," or something like that.

You never hear of adults spanking a child who is bigger than they are--which makes me wonder if spanking, for some people, is part of their power trip. Spanking children, among other things, might teach children that it's okay for a bigger person to strike a smaller person if the bigger person is "right" and the smaller person is not going along with that.

I think it's almost always better to talk things out, and I think children can be much better listeners than some adults give them credit for.

I've got 6 kids and have never really spanked any of them, though I have threatened to spank them--and that's probably no good, either. But when I do that it's usually because I 'm trying to help them remember to stay out of the street, or something like that.

Jake Dykstra

English student said...

where i am from, spanking a child is common. i think a child needs to be spank sometimes to realize whats good from wrong. when i was a child i was spanked many times when i don't obey what i was told. but i learned that if i do not obey my parents, i already know the consequenses. a child should not be treated like an angel because thats when they become less respectful. they know that they think they are on the top of the world, therefore they lose respect to others. a spanking will tell the kids where are they standind and they will aslo learn to respect. cristobal