You are in the middle of a child custody battle--the ex-husband and his girlfriend decide to fight for custody after having nothing to do with the child for 2 1/2 years. The mother has done nothing wrong except to try and bring up her child. The ex-husband and girlfriend lie and pull in their friends to lie, the judge buys their story, and the child is taken away from its mother. You can appeal but no new evidence is permissible. What do you do?
Do you think that judges are fair and impartial? You find out after the battle that this particular judge always goes with his favorite attorney, his friend so to speak. What do you do? Where do you turn? If you know that people are lying in a case, what can you do? Should our judges have the final say? What can we do as citizens to prevent this from happening?
Pam Boatz 9:00 a.m.
22 comments:
I believe that we have the best judicial sysyem that money can buy.I dont think judges in family court are always right.I dont think they are fair and impartial although there are maybe a couple exceptions to that rule.I know from first hand experience in other matters that judges do rule in favor of the side represented by their golfing buddy.This is a sad but true fact and it has been this way for as long as we have had a judicial system.As citizens there is absolutely nothing we can do about this.However in the scenerio you describe If i knew i was right and in order to be true to myself and my daughter,I would have no choice but to take my daughter and leave the state or country, whatever i had to do to keep my child with me.
First people need to act right. When you say "I do" follow through with your promises. that would ultimately solve that problem. But we all know that falls through.
If you feel you are going to have an unfair trial do to the reasons explained, you can rightful request a change of venue. Judges are given way too much power but that's our government for you. If you're going into this sort of case bring you game. Get evidence, get friends, home videos, phone calls, anything to disprove their lies.
first and foremost no the courts are not always right. they never can and never will be. thats all there is to it because nobody is prefect. in the ideal world nobody would lie and the courts would be fair and impartial. of course in an ideal world there wouldnt be any crimes commited either. i just believe that a judge should do the best that s/he can do and choose whats best for the child. send him or her to the best possible home that would take the best care of them.
Jesse Meyer
I know that for a fact that judges cannot be fair and impartial they have feelings and all our T.V. show glorify them having feelings and then snapping on people. If you know that they are lying about the kids you get a better (liar) and have him ask for a lie detacher test when they refuse then you should have some pull. There is another way is trial by peers this is one way to use people’s feelings to give the mother a better case for the most part.
As far as the judge ruling with his favorite( lair) you should do research on it and if he does go with that same person every time in cases like this you can show that to the apple board and most likely take it to a different court or even a higher court.
To stop this from happening we need to do a lot of things, some would say it lays on the parents, yet others thing that the courts are the only way to settle thing. I my honest opinion is that if you are going to get married these days you put it all in a per nub or deal with the way these fucked up courts are. There is no way to get people to be fair and impartial! We cannot turn off are feelings no matter what one says you still think about if that would happen to me I would do this and there for influence you decision on a ruling. I pray this help you.
Daniel Dubson
It's not a secret that judges and cops are sometimes crooked. Unfortunately we will always have the people who get paid money to go against the law and do what is fair in their own terms, and do what gets them paid. These opeople will sometimes never get caught, but they're out there.
Then there are the people who take their job seriously and want the best for the children and men and women who walk in and out of their courtroom every day.
These people should cancel out the crooked ones, because they claim there is hope. No, these courts aren't always correct, but you have to put your trust in them, and that's all that you can do.
Pam well as i am studing criminal justice i can proudly tell you that courts are so unfair its not even funny. They say that courts should be nuetral and selfsuficiant, y which i mean they should pay there electric bill and all of the paychecks from their own money. Well thats what makes the courts so unfair, someone or i should say our taxes pay for all of that.
Now when you say you can appeal, but no new evidence is permisable that is true, but appealing will get you a second chance so i would say that whoever this is in this problem i would because you could get a different judge to overview the case. The only thing that could happen is you would lose the case again. And if the person is lying well you can't do anything about it because he never said anything to his attorney because they are soppose to tell the judge when their client is lying. The only thing that i can say is try appealing because its a second chance that might have a different outcome. As for the judges and courts being unfair, thats how this world made them so we just have to overcome the fact that our justice system is crap.
Brandt Breymeyer (9:00)
in this situation, i think it'd be hard to be a judge because you don't know the situation ahead of time. you don't know the people so if someone lies, you don't know. you just take their word for it. i think that judges are doing their best to be fair, but i imagine that these cases are fairly difficult for them.
finding out the judge is "a friend" i would take it back to ourt against the judge. maybe you can't do that. but i'd go to a high authority and complain.
i'm not sure there is much that we can do. we just stand our ground and tell the truth. as long as we're doing our part, the rest is up to the judge. it's sad and unfortunate, but hey, life isn't always fair. i hate to say that but if the judges do have the final say, then there really is nothing we can do.
Wow Pam, this is a hard one. I can't image what it would be like for a family to go through this or a scenario similar. When I worked for a law office one summer I met with a judge that was friends with the attorney I knew. We talked about his line of work and sometimes the decisions that were hard to make. I thought I wanted to go into that field someday, but after listening to him speak I don't think I would be able to make those hard choices when someone brings in a problem such as the one you brought up.
He said, everytime a new case was brought in he had to look at it impartially and without any bias.
I know that all judges wouldn't be like him, they would look at appearances, previous offenses, people involved, attorneys there and other outside influences.
It seems hard to listen to a story and be able to decipher lies from truth.
Even our juries seem to have problems, we're all humans and make mistakes. I don't know how judges or even juries can hear a story and decide a fate for someone else. I really don't know how we as citizens can prevent others from choosing the wrong path. How do we know what is wrong in the end. The problem above, seems to be obvious, but then there are others that may not be. what then? I don't know, I just hope that our system will continue to work and maybe this means we need more check sand balances within the judging system. Two judges instead of one?
I think we have a good judical system. There are many loop holes and it is not always fair to everyone. In the scenerio you described the judge should have maybe granted visitation instead of full custody to the father, especially knowing that he had nothing to do with the child for 2.5 years. I know through first hand experience that the judical system takes along time over a custody case. I am in the middle of one right now. As much as I dont like my sons mother I would not want to take her right of raising him away from her even though I have been screwed so far along. The only time I would do that is if she was physicially harming him.
Colin H.
unfortuatly our judicial system is very flawed and in somecases sexist. its hard to decide the fate of child mostly because they acctually dont know the people and the circumstances. so it makes it hard for any one to choose and sometimes judges are sexist like when a male jusdge gives the father the rights and no the mother. it never seems fair in court and i think many couples could make a sensible decision
Dave Gagen
I'd like to think that our judges are as fair as they can be, but I know realistically that deep down everyone is a little biased whether they try to be or not. In a situation where you find out later that a judge was purposely biased, there should be a better system of appeal. Citizens should be able to have another judge, or even set of judges, look at the case again. It is very hard to prove that someone is lying unless there is physical evidence incriminating them. Unfortunately, there are so many cases that it would be hard to make a judge or court take you seriously when you say that your case was flawed, you are a capable mother, and your ex was lying. It is sad to think of how many cases may be wrongly judged, and we would never even know it.
the truth is there is nothing you can do. you can keep trying to fight it but if someone thinks their then there is not much you can do. but, these kind of problems would not come about if people today would think marriage like a car. when you first buy that new car its the best thing ever, but as the years go on if the car isn't cared for it starts to rust and fall apart. with care and love the car will last longer than the owner. i don't know much about custody battles but what about the kids, how do they feel? Let them decide who they what to live with.
Derek Diesburg
I personaly think that our judges are unfair in certain cases. I have experienced first hand the child custody battle. In this incident where the ex-husband and his girlfriend are trying to take the child away when they had no part in the childs life for 2 1/2 years can be solved. You have proof that the ex has had no part because your child is living proof, the child can tell the jury when the last time he/she saw their father or heard from him or when the last time he came to a school event. When it comes to the judge to have the final say, there is nothing wed can do.
Chris Waters
I think that if the father had no part in the child's life that the judge would find that out. the judge would probably ask the child what was true and what wasnt. The reason we have three types of courts is to help with problems like these. If you think that the judge was wrong in their decision, you can go to an appellate court. If you still find the judge to be wrong you can turn to the supreme court. If it hasn't changed after those other two courts then i have no clue on what to do. I think that we have a good system here in America with our judicial system. I have never been to court but my mom has, the judge didnt rule in her favor but i still trust the judges decision.
I think that the judge in the particular scenario that you brought up was very unfair. It is totally unfair to that mother who had taken care of that child for 2 1/2 years then have the father who did whatever he wanted for 2 1/2 years decide that he now wants to play a part in that childs life win the case and get custody of the child. Any judge should be able to tell that this is a load of crap, and that the child would be better off staying with his mother. I definitely think that in cases like this where there is favoritism being played by the judge and lying being done by witnesses and other corrupt things being done in a case involving a childs life that there needs to be something that can be done to stop this.
Well that sounds like a bad situation to begin with. Its hard to answer since most of us haven't ever experienced anything like that. What are you going to do if who you are fighting in court lies about his story and the judge believes him. You can't do anything. I don't know a lot about custody battles, but one thing i do know is that most of the time the judges are more bias to the mothers. I dont know of anything that us citizens could do to fix this problem. Im thinking that change is going to have to come from the inside. Maybe Obama will fix this issue, not like he has much other stuff to do.
No I don't think that judges in family court are always right but i do believe that they try their best to make the right decision. they can only go by what is being said or the evidence that is given to them. People lie and i feel that is why the judges sometimes make the wrong decisions. I just say when people get married just try your best to love him/her the best way that you can and try to keep the promises that you made the day you said I DO that way all of this can be avoided and you can have a happy Marriage:)
I have been in this situation, but on a much higher scale. My mother kidnapped me and my dad spent 4 years trying to find me and finally did. Since my dad and mom had joint custody, my dad fought for full custody, and won. So from my experience, i believe that the judicial is fair. Judges look at all the evidence, and do not base there desicion on who is there favorite. I am not saying that there are those kind, but for that most part it is as fair as it is going to get.
Kevin Dozier 9:00
The judicial sys. is messed up and it does take a long time to get anything done. we do hire "judges" that are supposed to be completely nuetral in any case and decide on what he has heard. and in this situation its true that a judge will favor a lawor that would happen to be his "friend" and a lawor will fight harder for you, in ANY case for more money. with that said, i dont know how this kind of stuff really works, but heres the thing, the judge has only heard what has happened in court and what the lawors have told him. he does not actually know the people. i think custodie deals shoould have a lot to do with friends and family of both parties.
randy bustle
the judges that are in family courts have one of the hardest jobs i think. its sad to say but there is people in the world that will do all this to get what they want. they will be lie and trick people its a sad sad thing but thats how it works. there is a difference between knowing that they are lying and knowing how to prove it. your gonna need real proof to win that battle sadly.
I think that sometimes judges are unfair and you just have to do the best you can. Get yourself a good lawyer if possible and pray to god everyday to guide you and your lawyer in the right direction.
Ashleymitchell
well for staters you can try to make it work or get a real good lawyer.
65 mustang
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