Tuesday, July 03, 2012

To be (equal) or not to be?


Do you think that marriage is only for Christian, male/female couples? Why/why not?

Do you think same-sex marriage will ruin the institution of marriage?

What if they are Christian homosexuals? Do your religious beliefs influence your opinion on the topic?

What is your opinion on civil unions?

Why is it okay for people like Britney Spears to have a "joke that went too far" marriage that was annulled after just 55 hours, but gay couples that have been together for years can't get married at all?

What do you think of heterosexual couples that decide not to get married until everyone can get married? Can you see yourself doing that?

Any other opinions, comments, rants about gay people being able (or not being able) to get married?

-----

Andi



17 comments:

English student said...

Personally I think that marriage should be between a man and a woman. That is based on my religious beliefs BUT I do not look down on others for the choice that they make. The constitution does allow for this when it says all men are created equally and the Declaration of Independence says that we have the right to the pursuit of happiness.
What ruins marriage for me is when it is treated as a joke and the meaning of vows are lost. This is reflected in the high divorce rate. I my opinion it is a very sad thing and gives me even more drive to have a marriage like my parents and grandparent. Rebecca S

English student said...

Anyone should be able to marry anyone. To say otherwise is absurd; hopefully the folks who disagree with it will someday want to live in a free country. Until now, I haven't heard of people who could get married refusing to do so as sort of a boycott, and while I can't really see this having much effect on anything other than themselves, the message seems to be good. Addison

English student said...

Although I don't have an issue with gay people this topic to me is self-explanatory. Marriage should be between a man and a woman, not because religion told me so but rather nature. If throughout human history it became the norm for people to be homosexuals the human race would be extinct. Additionally why it is OK to discriminate against people who practice incest or polygamy, but to tell gay people they can't be married is wrong.
If everyone should be able to marry whoever they want people should be allowed to marry their cousin, or have 20 wives. But doing either of these is outlawed and you will in many cases be prosecuted. It’s not that I believe that incest or polygamy should be legal. It just expecting some consistency with our law and not being a complete hypocrite. If you are willing to support all forms of marriage including between related people, polygamy, or even bestiality I would say that you can support gay marriage as well without being a hypocrite. However the argument against these practices are they are unnatural and don't fall under the traditional definition of marriage. Neither does to guys getting married to each other. People argue it is unnatural to allow related people to marry because of the chance they have deformed offspring. Well if the only thing that make a marriage legit is the children your produce, then since gay people can't have kids they would have an illegitimate marriage.
I don't think that any of the above groups should be able to be married. However I do belief if you can justify gay marriage you should be able to justify everything else different that falls outside the context of traditional marriage.
Schnitzel

English student said...

Love is love no matter if it is a man and a woman, a man and a man, or a woman and a woman. And though I am a Christian, I believe that God loves us all no matter who we want to marry and that people cannot help they way they are born. Now, when I say love is love, people could argue the points of: "then what about bigamy?" or "what about incest?" or even "what about adults and children?"

I do not agree with the latter. While I agree that you should be (and I know you are) allowed to marry across races, and I agree with gay marriage, incest and pedophilia disgust me. Bigamy, on the other hand, just makes me angry. If you truly love someone, you SHOULD NOT run around bringing other people into the marriage, that's just someone trying to excuse having affairs with other people.

Now, incest, causes health problems in offspring, gay marriage does not. (Mostly due to the fact that two people of the same gender cannot bear offspring.) But even if the two same-sex parents have their DNA and genes passed on scientifically to a fetus, that fetus will not be malformed like it would if it were the product of incest.

Pedophilia disgusts and infuriates me. I do not give two anything or what have you, whether they are born that way or not (yes that is hypocritical of me), hurting children is sick and pathetic. Children are not able to consent to anything sexual or martial related and need their days to be focused on growing and learning without adults harassing them. The men and women who suffer from this, need help to not act because they could start a chain effect where their victim ends up becoming the abuser (that has a psychological explanation behind it that is long and confusing but I apologize that I am not including it).

All that being said, using gay marriage as an out to say you can marry whatever you want is sick. People need to stop using love to claim that they can do whatever they wish.

The bottom line: bisexual, gay and straight couples should all be allowed to marry no matter what race, economic background or ancestral line.

Lauren Smith

English student said...

Hey Schnitzel, thank you for sharing your opinions with me.

First off I'd just like to say that although this is an unpopular opinion, I don't have a problem with polygamy as long as it is consensual and isn't one of those cult-like ones where the women are practically prisoners and are forced into marriage at a young age. Not sure if you've seen the show but I think TLC's "Sister Wives" is a great representation of what polygamy should be like if you choose that type of relationship. I am a fan of monogomy myself, but to each his own. Incest is a little different in my opinion, because that can lead to having deformed babies or ones with mental illnesses and I believe it's much easier to be coerced into a sexual relationship by a family member if you are a young child and don't know any better. But I have to give my honest opinion, if it's two consenting adults that don't have biological children with each other in the marriage (I have no problem with adoption in this case) I am okay with people getting married to their family members. I wouldn't do it, but then again I'm straight so I wouldn't have a same sex marriage either and I'm okay with those. And on the topic of bestiality, the animal cannot give its consent so I don't believe it's fair to relate it to same sex marriage, as both partners are willing and the relationship is consensual.

Andi

English student said...

Hey Addison, thanks for your opinions. The people who I was talking about waiting to get married until everyone could are actually Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. They have decided to get married now because their children begged them to, but if such high profile celebrities felt this way, surely there must be others that are boycotting marriage until marriage equality exists. I agree that it probably doesn't have that much of an effect on the debate of same sex marriage, but I think the same thing could be said about people wearing pink ribbons for breast cancer; it's more about spreading awareness than anything else, but I still think it's a very respectable thing to do.

Andi

English student said...

Hey Rebecca, thanks for sharing.

I am not religious at all so that definitely influences my beliefs on the subject. I don't agree with the "man shall not lie with man" (I think it's something like that) part of the bible, it rubs me the wrong way, but I respect that that's something you believe in. I completely agree with you that some people treat marriage as a joke and don't take it seriously, but I still think that everyone should get the chance to enjoy the experience that is marriage if that's what they want. I know I can't wait until my wedding day and I would be crushed if I knew that I couldn't have that opportunity just because of my sexuality.

Andi

English student said...

Hey Lauren, I don't have a lot to respond to with your post because I agree with almost everything you said, haha.

As I've stated before, I am not religious, but I think if you can be both religious and open minded about subjects that are in the bible, it's a great thing. Our opinions differ when it comes to polygamy but I agree with the pedophilia comments. I don't think it's hypocritical at all to be pro-same sex marriage but against pedophilia; a child cannot consent and therefore having any kind of romantic/sexual relationship with them is wrong and that's that. I agree on your chain effect comment as well. Thanks for sharing your opinions with me!

Andi

English student said...

I don’t think it’s okay to say that only a man and a woman should get married. Everyone has the right to choose the person they want to marry. My question is who are we to decide that only a man can marry a woman. Love is love, god gave everyone a heart and loves us no matter who we want to marry. If a man is happy or think that he can get the happiness he want from another man than who are we to restrict that. In fact, whoever says no to gay marriage is actually saying that gay people have no right to be happy. Civil union is something I don’t really care about if a couple wants to have lawful union than that’s there choose, however I would want to get married in an Indian traditional way.

-Nilay

English student said...

I believe that the idea of marriage is to legally make a couple be together forever. If it is a thing that there just so happens to be a couple of the same sex that feel strongly towards each other, by all means let them get married. I was always told that once someone gets married to a person, that you're bound to that person for life but now a days with everyone getting divorces and what not, it just seems pointless for the idea of a person to get married when they could easily get divorced if they wanted to. I think if any couple, of any gender, feel the need to be legally bonded because they feel that there feelings toward the other isn't strong enough without this idea of marriage, then by all means let the gay people get married. Then if they realize marriage was a bad idea for a relationship then they have the ability to get divorced if they choose so.

John

English student said...

Same-sex marriage is wrong, but at least it doesn't hurt anyone. It's not right for people of the same-sex to create a family since they can't create a real one. There is a reason why it takes a man and a woman to have a child, that's the law of nature and God. However, compared to other sins; same-sex marriage does not hurt others like lying, stealing, or killing does. Maybe gay people are just a way to limit population growth, who knows. Personally I think that homosexuals have some kind of mutation that attracts them to the same sex. They can't help it if they are only turned on by the same sex. Since they are like that, they have no choice but to pursue them for their happiness.

-Charlie

English student said...

I don’t think marriage is only for Christians. I think marriage is designed to define the love and commitment two people have for one another. It wouldn’t really be fair to ask everyone to believe in the same things, such as being Christian for instance, because the world be super dull and uneducated. I don’t think same-sex couples will ruin the institution of marriage. How often do you hear about same sex couples getting divorced? How often do you hear about opposite sex couples getting divorced? Honestly, I don’t think I have ever heard about a gay couple divorcing—not to say that it doesn’t happen—but I think that opposite sex couples really take advantage of the marriage system by marrying too young, or when they aren’t ready, and then divorcing. Case in point, I believe that if anything is ruining the institution of marriage, it would be people abusing the system. I don’t think people like Britney Spears should have more advantages than gay couples. It isn’t fair and they are reasons for the institution of marriage not succeeding as well.

Why shouldn’t gay couples be able to believe in God? Who are we to tell others what they can and cannot believe in? A gay person can be raised to believe in God, but he cannot be raised to be straight or gay, so there are things that one can control, but others one cannot. I am impartial to civil unions. Who am I to stop a couple from being happy? It is none of my business what another couple does; just as it is none of their business what I do. Since there are still states where gay couples can get married, I don’t see a problem with getting married when the time is right for me. I don’t see the point in waiting until everyone else can.

Chelsey

English student said...

I believe that marriage is for a man and a woman but like everyone else, my opinion doesn't matter to the same sex people that are in love. I don't protest or throw flaming bottles at gay couples. In fact, I treat them like regular human beings. I am a Christian myself and yes the bible does say that same sex marriage is wrong, but it does not say that we must do everything, or anything at all, in our power to stop someone from doing so. Marriage isn't a legal matter, people were getting married long before there were laws about marriage and marriage licenses. It's a personal matter and to me, it's also a biblical matter as well.

-Cherie

English student said...

I am not against gay marriage because in no way does it affect me directly but I definitely am not a supporter of it either. To me love should be between and a man and a women. I do not think that gay marriage is for any sort of Christian because the Bible describes gay marriage as immoral and indecent; it also clearly shows marriage as love between a man and a woman. I don’t really understand how gays can consider themselves as Christians because it is going against the Bible but they might also argue that everyone goes against the Bible every day by sinning.

Elizabeth Luke

English student said...

I admit I strongly believe in gay marriage, and that people shouldn’t be judged for loving someone of the same gender. It’s really about love and commitment and being heterosexual doesn’t guarantee that. We are surrounded by divorce in our personal lives and in the media. I don’t believe same-sex marriage will ruin the institution of marriage, because again, love and commitment aren’t all about gender. I have no real religious influence on this topic, but I do know some Christians who are in healthy gay relationships.
I feel that a civil union is a good start, but it’s only the first step with a long way to go. From what I read, a civil union is only recognized in the state in which is was performed in and can only be ended in that state. Aside from that, they don’t get the full benefits a married person would receive.
I think it’s cool for people to postpone their marriage to support others for this respectable cause. I like it but I don’t feel the personal passion to do this myself. I think it’s disgusting and sad that gay couples who have been together for years when people like Britney Spears can take advantage of something that others consider holy and sacred.

-Sam

English student said...

I don't care. I suppose I should, but what's stopping us allow this? Is it the years of growing up under one roof of a male parent and female one? I think marriage can between anything. "If you love it so much, why don't you marry it?" A common quote used among our generation as children. What changed that,honestly? The Effiel Tower is married off to a woman from San Fransisco. Is that wrong to do? Honestly it is a little weird, but who are we to judge and condemn the feelings of another.

I know someone who is Christian and gay. I know for a fact that being a homosexual doesn't influence your beliefs. Correct me if I'm wrong, but God loves everyone, right? The bible may say something, but like many have argued; do you follow everything that the bible says? We've stopped doing many things that the bible tells us is wrong, but we can't do it again?

I know marriage means a lot to certain people and they see this as a disgrace to the act, but is it justified? The only different from back in the 60's and now is that it was a man and a woman, but the man or woman was African American.
Despite how hard people try, if you have more than half of the country willing to make this legal, than what is the point of trying to keep it illegal?

Katherine Stack

English student said...

Marriage was made for a man and women and should not be changed for any reason. I feel as same sex couples have every right to be together but as domestic partners not as man and man or women and women, civil union also is another route for these couples to be as miserable as every married couple are. This is true that some heterosexual couples abuse the holy union of marriage regardless of the fact a union between a man and women is how it is and how it should be. I feel as there should be a waiting period for couples who want to get married, that way we won’t have any more mistakes such as the Brittany spears mess up.
-Christopher Hodges