Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Ambers Question on child abuse

Hello. My name is Amber Franklin from John's 9:00 a.m class. If you could please answer my question, that would be very appreciated!

Should parents spank kids? When does discipline become abuse? Do you or will you spank your own children? Why or why not?

Thank You!

20 comments:

English student said...

I don't know if they should or shouldn't spank them but I do believe it's ok to if they choose. It's not abuse and I think it also depends on the severity of what they did. Kids have atitudes and sometimes they need an adjustment. If you don't fix the problem while they are at an early age it's only going to get worse as time goes on. If you sit them in time out they still play around and don't really get the jist of what they did was wrong. If you ground them so what they listen to music, talk on the phone, or play video games but if their ass is red and they are crying then it's likely what they did wrong is going to sink in and probably won't happen again just because of the consequenses.

Ryan Schoolcraft

English student said...

Hi, Amber. I'm against spanking across the board (or WITH a board, for that matter). I don't think physical contact is ever the best lesson. I think spanking often sends the wrong message. The message might be, "When all else fails, it's okay to hit," or something like that.

You never hear of adults spanking a child who is bigger than they are--which makes me wonder if spanking, for some people, is part of their power trip. Spanking children, among other things, might teach children that it's okay for a bigger person to strike a smaller person if the bigger person is "right" and the smaller person is not going along with that.

I think it's almost always better to talk things out, and I think children can be much better listeners than some adults give them credit for.

I've got 6 kids and have never really spanked any of them, though I have threatened to spank them--and that's probably no good, either. But when I do that it's usually because I 'm trying to help them remember to stay out of the street, or something like that.

John Wentworth

English student said...

from phil gould.

it's quite simple..."spare the rod and spoil the child." if you don't correct bad behavior, it will only get worse. (of course, there are people that go overboard on the punishment.)

English student said...

Parents should not have to resort to spanking, however some children do not respond to time outs or verbal warnings, and there for the parent's only recourse is to use physical punishment.
John Maxwell

English student said...

No, parents should not spank their children. I don't believe in spanking, never have, and will never spank my children. I was never spanked as a children as everything turned out fine.

Many parents spank their children though and I don't understand what they get out of it. From the day that your children are born you teach them not to hit. When they see you spank them or "hit" them they then think it is okay as well. There are many alternitives to turn towards instead. Taking away a toy, or something they cherish, or puting them in time out. Time out to children is not fun. When they are in the middle of playing and have to stop..it kills them. There are better ways to take care of things without spanking.

My mom has a daycare and when one of her children does something wrong she always tells them "NO" and leads them in a different direction. That usually takes care of the problem. We do have a time out chair in our house..but it hardly ever gets used. All in all, parents should not have to spank their children.

Tiffany Hartke

English student said...

I guess the question for me would be "Do you want to teach your children that violence is a solution in some cases?" It just makes sense that if you spank your kids you are teaching them that physical punishment is okay, at least in some cases. I'm not necessarily going to call that right or wrong, as I have to acknowlege this is sometimes the case, but I do believe that there is always a better option than physical violence, even if the results aren't as dramatic or immediate. I don't have any kids so i can't pretend that I know what it's like trying to deal with a little problem child; maybe my mind will sway either one way or the other if I ever end up in that situation.

James Koltz

English student said...

I do not believe in spanking. There are so many other ways to handle a situation. Talking to children is always the best choice because we teach them how to handle situations and how to control their emotions. Some children are very strong willed. I know from experience, that the parent must have control of their child when they are little, or you will have a disaster in the teen years. If all other forms of discipline fail, you may have to spank.

Robbin Russell

5:04 PM

English student said...

I was spanked as a child and all it did was spark fear in me instead of teaching me the so called lesson. There are so many different ways to discipline a child instead of hitting them. All options should be tried before raising a hand to a child. Physical violence is never acceptable in any form.
Hannah

English student said...

Hi, Amber--You know I'm so much older than the clasmates we have this semester and I'm from the old school. I (whip)my children only in which they did things they knew was wrong. But you know these days parents are going over board with the way they punish there children. Some kids are wining up dead. So the goverment has to intervene the way we punish our children. You have some females out there that never should have kids. Especially that women name Amanda Hamm just going on trial coming up for drowning her three kids.
Daryl Brown

English student said...

Personally i think that all kids should be disciplined in some way or another but too many times the parents get out of control and beat their children. my view on this is tat all parents hsould have ot go through a parenting class before they have a child. I will spank my children but i will not do it to the extent that they either fear or hate me. i will be authoritative but not abusive!

benjamin mckenna

English student said...

I do not believe in spanking. There are so many other ways to handle a situation. Talking to children is always the best choice because we teach them how to handle situations and how to control their emotions. Some children are very strong willed. I know from experience, that the parent must have control of their child when they are little, or you will have a disaster in the teen years. If all other forms of discipline fail, you may have to spank.

Robbin R.

English student said...

Yes Amber, I do believe in spanking your children. I think as a parent you must start early with discipline and as the parent you should teach your children right from wrong. Children today learn how to hit, curse, spit etc. These are the things they learn and then we as parents correct it. The way these children are now with attitudes is rediculous. My mother spanked me and my siblings and I turned out just fine. I spank my children when they are being rebellious. However, I will say that as a Parent you do not have to result in spanking for everything they do. Mary Moore

English student said...

I think that spanking should never be your default parental setting, but that there are occasions when it is justified.
I belive the line between discipline and abuse is drawn in the mind of the parent. What are the intentions and thoughs behind the discipline?
I have one beautiful two year old girl and yes I "spank" her. My first choice to teach my daughter anything is always positive or negitive reinforcement. If niether of these two are applicable, and I'm seeking to correct an inappropriate behavior then I choose to punish my Daughter first by using the timeout method. However sometimes my daughter will not be "ruled" and no amount of reasoning will make a difference. In this case I resort to smacking her hand or giving her a gentle swat on the diaper. I feel that the good (teaching my daughter that there are some situations in which you must blindly follow orders) outweighs the bad (teaching my daughter that sometimes a person must resort to physical violence). Both of these sentiments are an unfortunate reality to life.
Matt D.

English student said...

Spanking is a last resort to discipline. If you tell your kid not to do something and they do it anyway what do you do? Scream at them? Screaming or telling them to go to time out will not make them stop. It still doesn't deter them from not minding you.
David S.

English student said...

I don't think parents should ever hit their children. It is only setting an example for the children that it is okay for them to hit people as well. I have seen many parents who hit their children, and often, the children don't hold back to hit them back. These children are also usually the violent ones at school too. They are seeing it at home and using it everywhere else. I think parents only spank their children because they are so angry and need to get it out. I don't really feel it teaches the kids a lesson, it just makes them scared of their parents.

Elizabeth Moody

English student said...

I believe yes parents should spank kids. I've always believed (for as long as i can remember anyways) that one saying "Spare the rod, spoil the child". In order for discipline to work though it has to be consistent. And not all bad behaviors by children warrant a spanking. But sometimes as John M. said some children don't respond to time outs or verbal reprimands. Discipline i'd say would become abuse, when and if the parent were to start beating the kid's face, or body (other than the butt). Or by spanking to hard for the severity of the crime. My parents spanked us and we turned out just fine. Although they didnt do it for petty things.
Its pretty much true to say talking doesn't solved everything, yea it would be great if it did, but some people don't respond to anything but force. I do believe i would spank my children if they needed it.
-Richard Hon

English student said...

I think kids should get spankings to teach them what not to do....the parents should be smart enough to know when abuse becomes a part of them spanking their child, if they dont no they need help. I do paln on having children in the future years and no-matter what the laws are and stuff i will still spank my kids when they do wrong and they(kid(s)) no that they shouldnt, just telling the "no" wont make a difference....
britt miller

English student said...

I'm a little torn on this subject. I definitely do not agree with spankings that involve paddles, belts, foreign objects etc. I think it's unnecessary, harmful and dangerous. (can lead to abuse) I also don't agree with using spanking as the main discipline (regular basis) That said, have I ever spanked my kids before? Yes, I have. The times they were spanked was when they hurt one another or did something very dangerous. It was done mostly because I was freaked out/worried/upset about the situation. My main form of punishment is taking away a toy or a priviledge and I imagine I'll ground them for things when they're older. I just have a hard time spanking them and then trying to teach them not to hit one another. I know there is a difference but it seems a little hypocritical in a sense. Katrina Schoonover

English student said...

I think children should be spanked when needed. I don't think they have to be spanked for everything they do wrong, there need to be a balance. I do spank my children, but i am finding that more and more children think that spanking is abuse.

Beverly Burnside

English student said...
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