Monday, July 18, 2011

To spank or not to spank a child?


Do you think that there should be some kind of disciplinary action in the school system like there was in the older days? Is it ok for children to come to class and be rude and violent towards the teacher? Do you think that the disciplinary actions that are in effect in today's school systems are resulting in positive feedback from a disobedient child? What are some effective ways to discipline a child without it being considered child abuse?

Makeisha Riley

17 comments:

English student said...

Let me start by saying that smacking a child's hand or behind is not considered child abuse. I commend teachers now-a-days for all they have to deal with. Another thing that is pretty much common knowledge is that the kids that are so out of control and displaying violence toward teachers are the ones who have parents that don't care how their child acts or show violence towards others themselves. It is wrong on the parents part to allow this to happen and more than likely their child will end up in trouble when they are older. Discipline in schools in nonexistent now, detention, in school suspension, out of school suspension they are rewards for the rude and violent child who doesn't want to be there anyway. I think the best form of discipline would be to make a parent or guardian have to sit in class with that particular child for a few hours. First that almost guarantees that the parent will rectify the situation later because they had to take time to sit in class. Not to mention the fact that it would embarrass the child, hopefully enough to not want the parent to have to sit in class again. So I guess to the title of the question, I spank my child but, I don't think a teacher should because I don't know that a teacher won't get "carried away" and cause harm.
Amber Johnson-Garcia

English student said...

I totally think there should be some kind disciplinary action in our school system. Too many kids are getting away with being way to mouthy and many of them have gotten that from there parents or lack of parental support. I guarantee if you were to spank a kid in school today not only would the person doing the spanking lose their job, but the school or even the district would have a major law suit on their hands.I survived just fine with spanking in schools and so have many other people and they have no ill effects from being spanked. Yes, some people claim they have mental anguish from being spanked in school, I say BS, that is just an excuse for someone to use so they don't have to take responsibility for their own actions. I can probably count on one hand how many times I had to spank, or for that matter, smack my daughters in the mouth and they are just fine. I do feel that the majority of discipline needs to come from home but if my kids acted out at a friends house or school, their parents or teachers knew by all means they had my permission to spank them if they got out of line.

No,I don't think there has been positive feedback from the way children in schools are being disciplined. The same drama or even more drama is created now more than ever,furthermore in my opinion there have been more acts of violence than when I was in school, from school shootings to gang violence we as a society have started to expect it and become numb to the idea...that is just plain SAD! With my daughters I usually had to tell them a few times and when I raised my voice they knew and still know I am no longer messing around. Too many parents do not take responsibility for their own kids and think it is the teacher's job to make their kid a better person...WRONG!!!! If you don't show your child what is right or wrong at home then they know no other way to act and if people did show more care with their kids then this wouldn't be an issue. Our society has become lazy and relaxed and now it has started to bite us in the butt, if we all do a better job with paying attention to our own kids when they are young then maybe our society as a whole would be a lot better off than we are right now.

I don't feel a swat on the butt or a quick smack in the mouth is child abuse...yes multiple times--when i say multiple I mean five or more, in one shot is crossing the line. I truly believe if parents stopped trying to be their kids best friend and started being better parents a lot of the issue or problems kids have would start to clear up. I have always been apart of my daughters life's, but they also know I am not there to be their best friend, if they do something you can bet I will at least ground them or whatever. I understand kids need to make mistakes to grow, but when those mistakes are repeated over and over again it's time for a different approach and going back to spanking in school just might be the answer.

Buddy Carpenter

English student said...

In today’s society almost all spanking whether it’s spanking on the butt, slap in the mouth, time in the corner, being grounded, is ALL considered child abuse. Even if a child lies just to get their parent in trouble, they can still be charged with child abuse. This society in America is so corrupted that people can get away with almost anything.
I agree with Amber’s comment when she said that it’s the parent’s responsibility to punish the child. The school should not be involved because of course, “today’s society”. The government has allowed and banned too many things that should not have been. It’s not only the responsibility of the parents, but it’s the responsibility of the government because the government is the one who allowed these rules and guidelines. Back in the old days, teachers, principals, and parents were allowed to spank and punish children. Then the children were more obedient and listen. I remember when I first went to elementary school, I was spanked once and my mom flew into the principal’s office and she was pissed! She didn’t like that at all; she told them they have no right and that if there was a problem with me for them to take it up with her.
In other countries, people spank their children. Schools spank children. The parents don’t mind the school to spank the children because if they do something wrong, then the spanking will teach them a lesson. My husband told me back in his country he did something wrong in school and the teacher asked for his hand and hit his hand as hard as he could. But most of all, I think spanking and discipline should be done early, so the children won’t get out of control and lead to gun shootings or any other violent activities. In my personal opinion, the parents should be the ones doing the spanking; I wouldn’t like someone else to spank my child. As for children with learning disabilities who act out in school, I think the parents should take it easy with their children. Be persistent with their child and make sure they understand you and understand how they’re supposed to act with others. All children can get out of hand at some point. If parents discipline their child in one way and it’s not working then they need to try others ways which works. All children don’t respond to the same discipline, so be different. It doesn’t even necessarily have to come down to spanking. Be firm in your speech and let your child know you’re serious and that you mean business, don’t laugh, and don’t pretend you don’t see him doing something wrong because then it would only increase and instigate his mischievous ways.
I want to add something to Amber’s comment. I think it would be a good idea to let the parent go to school and watch his/her child without their child knowing just to see how he’s really acting in class. I think everyone would benefit, the school, teacher, classmates, child, and the parents.


Lori

English student said...

we should and diffinetly need to put displine back into the school system. Start it on day 1. there are ways of encouraging good behavior with out spanking. But if all else fails than yes; that should be the only option left. i had an very abusive father and when he did not hit us; he got the same affect in what he said. Disipline is a part of every day life. Just look what happens when someone starts a riot. No one really needs an exuse to do what they do; but is is because no one told or showed them differently and enforced it. Disciplining our children when they are young will benift them when they become an adult. the ones who recieve no discipline, have no respect for anyone, and usually end up in our prison system.if you give the teachers the right they deserve for displining our children; you would see less schools with police walking around in the halls, and metal detectors at all the doors. Disipline does need to start at home; but you here stories where if you spank them, you will be arrested. Obviously when they back down the next instance becomes more and more critical. I have good children; my wife and i are proud of them. Disipline was a big part of it; not child abuse.
I think part of it is there are a lot of single parent's out there and they are being pulled in so many different directions. The children are not getting the attention they need and are looking for ways to get it. We need to believe in ourselves and encourage our children. Give them all the love and support you can; the rest will fall in place.
kevin h

English student said...

Just coming out of high school, I believe that the disciplinary actions should go back to the way they were in the olden days, with physical punishment. I know enough people, many of them my friends, who enjoy causing trouble in class because they either hate the class, hate the teacher, or just don't care about the punishments. Sometimes it is all three of these put together.

I think in this day and age people have gone a little overboard with the 'child abuse'. Spanking a child when he or she have done wrong is not child abuse, it is teaching them a valuable lesson and instilling in them that it is wrong to do that certain thing, when words won't do the trick.

The disciplinary actions in today's classrooms are just ridiculous and don't mean anything anymore. The worst that can happen to a student, without getting expelled, is an out of school suspension, which means vacation for the student! (Even though they are getting 0's on all their assignments) Then it is an in-school suspension, which means you sit in a room, get all your homework done very fast, then end up taking a nap the rest of the day. Where is the punishment in that? Lastly, it is the detention, which means that person has to come and stay until 3:30 instead of 3, 'big deal'. The punishments in school really need to be re-worked.

English student said...

Comment above this was posted by Jake Bock

English student said...

I definitely think that there should be disciplinary action in schools like there was in the past. Those kids all survived and didn't behave the way kids do now. Children in today's schools can get away with acting absolutely out of control. I think part of it is just to get attention, and because they know they can get away with it without any real punishment. They can mouth off and be rude and it just results in a check mark or a thirty minute detention.
Those methods of discipline are not receiving a positive feedback from students. They still continue with their behavior and continue to receive the same form of punishment. Even if a note is sent home to a parent, or a phone call is made, there's no guarantee that the parents will even care or take their own form of action to reprimand the their child.
I attended a private school, and at the beginning of each year every parent had to sign a form agreeing to whatever punishment the school saw fit for their child if they were found to be acting out in a negative way. I do not think that it is abuse to strongly reprimand a child. All children are different, so the same method may not work with each of them. In my school, a lot of kids wouldn't cause trouble just because we knew that our parents had agreed to whatever punishment the principal wanted to give us. However, separating a child from class and forcing them to take a zero in that class couldn't be considered child abuse. Or even requiring them to do the work for that class in the principal's office. And if the child continues to act out, I do think that the punishments need to become more severe. Children aren't stupid...they'll get the point eventually.
-Hannah Miller

English student said...

There is a difference between spanking and beating. There is a line that is not to be crossed. Beating a child is very bad to them and on you as a parent. Using a belt is beating that is never ok. Times now compared to olden times are way different you cannot use belts in this generation. The line is crossed when bruises are left and spanking becomes beating. Disciplining a child can be as simple as taking a toy or something in value to them away.

Scotty Baker
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I believe that beating a child is not only illegal but morally wrong. A child at a young age is a sponge and when you are abusing them they are taught that violence is the answer and it is also pushing them away from the parents because then they are afraid of the parents. There most definitely a fine line between spanking and beating. The line should never be crossed and in my mind if you are a loving part it will never be crossed. I believe that you do not have to spank or hit your child in order to discipline them.

Tyler Farmer
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I think we have come a long way in the way we raise our children. In no circumstance is it ok to use a belt to discipline a child. I watched my best friend get abused as a child by his father and he used the belt, hand, switch, or whatever method he had at hand to beat Mike when he thought it was necessary. I raised two children and I think I spanked them each once in their lives. Once was a safety issue (he was running into traffic from a parking space) and the other was when my daughter punched my son in the belly. I thought they both deserved more than the "go to your room" approach. It is a lot easier to talk to a child and let them know what they did wrong and how it affects others than to get the belt out and beat the hell out of them because then the whole process is awash. They will remember how to discipline their children in the same way.

Jesse Hill 8:00
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I do not think that beating children should be legal. Yes, there are plenty of other ways you can show them that what they did was wrong. You can ground them for example. They are going to be more upset from not getting to participate in fun things with their friends rather than getting hit. Even though it will hurt them, being grounded lasts longer. You are also teaching them that hitting is okay. When they grow up they could be more likely to get in fights with others.
Macy
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I do believe it is okay to spank your child, however I do NOT believe in using anything but your hand. I believe it should be considered beating your child if you use anything other than your open hand. I believe parents who spank their child with a paddle or a switch should get the same punishment, but by someone who is just as big as they are. I know it wouldn't give the full effect as it does to a child but maybe it would help a little for the parent to understand what they are putting their child through. Also another thing to point out, a child's parent comes home (either one) and they are doing homework, playing, making dinner together all the "family" things. Then the other parent comes home and the house just feels taken over, now parents are screaming at each other toy are on the floor and the child see all this then gets a spanking with a belt because their toys are out. They are going to grow up thinking that it is okay to hit people, or yell at people.

Thysha Barnstormer

English student said...

I will never hit my children, my parents never hit me and I turned out fine. I was yelled at for doing wrong, which usually if I got yelled at or felt like I disappointed my parents or friends or anyone really I never did it again. I think that using punishment by spanking or hitting is the worst thing you can do. Punishing a kid by taking something away to stop them from doing something and letting them know what they have done wrong and why they are being punished is the right way of telling your kids that they shouldnt do what they have done is the best way to teach your children. In my Opinion.

Alex Smith
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When i was younger i used to get the belt but that was only on rare occasions. I think that when i become a parent i might spank my child but never something intense just a light smack.

Dylan Nonnster
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Ok listen here. I got the belt and it DID NOT teach me violence, but it taught me right from wrong. I will spank my children that is if I have them. But By using your hand that hurts the person spanking them and what did the person spanking the person do wrong, they don't deserve pain. I am not saying children deserve pain, but a little reminder not to do it again is ok. The belt hurts more and made do whatever I did wrong again. Also there should never be marks or bruises on the child that is not ok.

Micah Pope
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I don't think that anyone should hit a child, no matter how angry they may get. I think every parent should have a technique to get their child to behave rather that spanking them. It’s alright to hit your child on the hand lightly just to let them know that they did something wrong but they should spank them hard.

When I was a child, whenever I would do something wrong my mom would always threaten to get the belt but never once did she hit me with it. Yes, she spanked every once in a while but she only spanked me on the bottom once to let me know that I was being bad.

The more you spank your child the more they are going to be afraid of you. Most people think that if they spank their child then they will behave better but the truth is they just become to afraid to do anything when they are growing up.

Hillary Moore
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If your child goes to the extent where he/she back talks and doesn't listen just telling them what they do wrong isn't going to help. Trust me, my 8 year old sister does that to my parents all the time and they don't do anything about it and it irritates me. All they do is tell her to go to her room where there is a TV, toys and everything she uses pretty much. I believe that you can spank a child when they start to act like spoiled brats. It's not going to work by just telling them they are wrong. For heaven sakes they are little kids do you really think they are going to listen to you? NO! Spanking is one thing, but when you get to the point where you don't quit hitting them then you are beating. You need to know when enough is enough.

Falynn Clow

English student said...

I plan to never traumatize my children the way I was as a child. I have an overall anxiety of hatred and violence with people. For some reason I have always been scared. I think it is because I was scared as a child. My father believed the only way to get anything done right with us kids was to scare us into behaving. In my opinion being scared isn’t something your child should have to deal with too early or it ruins their level of anxiety for the rest of their lives. I think children should be taught, taught, and taught again and never ever hit unless it’s a lil swat on the hand, nothing too hard. Just like squirting the cat with water, you need to show the child they are misbehaving so they will not do it again, but there is no reason to take it beyond that. We are here to teach children not hinder their growing by making them frightened.

Jessica Ervin
Confusing well i should say people are confused because a lot of people say all a child need is a good whoopin but then they say you shouldn’t whoop your child i know definitely that there’s a difference between whooping your child and abusing your child but me personally wouldn’t whoop my child for no reason.
Ken Barbie
I was spanked as a child. That meant a swat on the butt, not a belt or extension cord, a hand. Now as a mother I have had to learn (the hardest way ever) that patience is a gift that should be used as much as possible. Young parents result to hitting because they have no patience. They also have to learn the skill in order to be in control of their actions. After my hard fall, I learned new ways of discipline. Immediate action is the key. Don’t let the sun go down, what two year old will remember breaking a glass or biting another child. Then appropriate action, let the punishment fit the crime. If a mess was made clean it up. If you hit someone, go stand in the corner you need some time to think. Talking with children before and after the discipline helps to reinforce your stance. If you never tell them why they are in trouble then they are left wondering and soon forget. Finally, positive attitudes. When they do anything good let them know you noticed the good behavior and reward them for their kindness or citizenship. My favorite form of discipline is the corner it works from age 18 months to 18 years, kids hate it!

Tyreis Littleton
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a commonly practiced means of punishing and disciplining children in many cultures: "Spare the rod, spoil the child." However, countless children have been raised well without a single spanking. Moreover, we also do not condone spanking because the line between spanking and abuse can be too thin for many care givers.

Susie Kyle

English student said...

Discipline is different from punishment because it teaches children to learn from their mistakes rather than making them suffer for them. In fact, imposing suffering actually shifts the focus from the lesson that needs to be learned to who is in control. As a result, punishment focuses on the parent being responsible for controlling a child's behavior, rather than the child controlling his/her own behavior, which is the focus of discipline.

Jordan J. Jordan

English student said...

Corporal Punishment means to use physical force with the intention of causing pain but not injury so as to correct or control behavior. This punishment includes spanking, hitting, slapping, pinching, lightly shaking, and other physical acts. Some researchers believe that when done in moderation by loving parents corporal punishment is more effective than other methods of punishment. Corporal punishment is banned in many countries such as: Austria, Bulgaria, Croatia, Cyprus, Finland, Germany, Hungary, Iceland, Latvia, Norway, Romania, Sweden, and Ukraine.
“Studies have shown that the more physical punishment a child receives, the more aggressive the child becomes and the more likely the child is to be antisocial or aggressive as an adult” A Child’s World by Papalia, Olds and Feldman.
Other studies have shown a link between children using aggression and inflicting physical pain as an acceptable way to respond to a problem. Other children withdraw after receiving corporal punishment and began to question why they are “bad” and become insecure with themselves.
My major is Child Development, and this summer we dug into the research of Corporal Punishment. Overall corporal punishment has too many negative aspects, and hitting a child can cause more mental damage then we are aware. There are many ways of correcting a situation and I could write a book on the appropriate ways to discipline a child, but books are already out there and most parents do what they want. Ultimately spanking is wrong; find another physiologically appropriate method to correct undesirable behavior.
Heather Denam

English student said...

In terms of disciplinary action and the “Old Days” I think that discipline starts at home. My mother has a little saying that goes a little something like this, “Wherever you go THERE you are”. This proverb basically means whether your at home, in the streets, at a five star restaurant, around millionaires, with your friends, in a shelter, or at school, your actions will be constant with WHO YOU ARE. Or in simpler terms, you’re going to be who you are wherever you are. I don’t have any kids but if you don’t give them the proper discipline then, they’re as good as a loose canon. Also, if your kids are disrespecting you, then their bound to disrespect someone else. Also discipline works on a two way street. If your receiving discipline on an excessive level then, when your kids grow up their just going to rebel against you. If they don’t join a gang, sell drugs, abuse their children, or use drugs, then they will probably abuse drugs, be the victim of a abusive relationship or turn to homosexuality. In terms of effective discipline the most effective thing is “detention”.. If you spend enough time in detention then your bound to mellow out. Especially, if you can’t do homework or anything else in detention (This is most effective of FRIDAY). If your looking at a chalkboard for an hour after school while everyone is walking home and having fun, then your bound to change eventually. If that doesn’t work, then “Saturday Work Detention” is your next best option. This is where you come to school at nine a clock in the mourning, when you could be sleeping at home, or watching Saturday morning cartoons and clean up. If you clean up the school from nine to four on a couple of your precious Saturdays, then you’ll figure out that this is not where you want to be--and you’ll gradually make a change.

Pikachu

English student said...

Alex

i think that there should be disciplinary actions to an extent. True I wouldn’t want a teacher to lay a hand on my kid, but something other than writing their name on the board should happen. I had a buddy who lived in Texas and one of the ways they handled fighting was they gave the 2 kids gloves and let them box it out. It was a way to control it, but they could also have their fight. If I had a kid and he was about to get in a fight, I would prefer that way over a spanking, or even a name on the board. Like someone I know said, the only thing expelling them teaches them is if you don’t want them there, they can just go home and watch tv, and most of the parent s today don’t do anything about it.

English student said...

I believe we should return to the days of old. It's a fact that the generations that had disciplinary consequences during their adolescent years had less problems of violence in their society. I do believe that if teachers were allowed to spank elementary school children, that children of today would be more respectful and less deviant.

It's definitely not okay for children to be rude and violent towards their teacher or anyone else for that matter. I believe that taking disciplinary action out of the schools, spanking specifically, has contributed to the problems society has to deal with in that we now have kids who just do whatever.

Khattab

English student said...

I am quite neutral on the subject of spanking. I believe each child should be reprimanded differently in accordance to how they respond to each punishment. I’ve seen children behave better when threatened with time out than with spanking. I do not think that schools should be allowed to hit a child if they are misbehaving. There are other ways of discipline and if the parent believes in physical punishment that is between them and their child. The school shouldn’t get involved in physical discipline of the child. They can inform the parents of the child’s misbehavior in school, but they have no place to take such drastic measures and begin to hit the child as a form of discipline. If a teacher cannot get a child to behave without using physical discipline, then they should leave all disciplinary action to the parent. If a parent wants to use spanking to discipline their own child, then that is fine. It is not abuse unless they start excessively beating the child.
Ayah

English student said...

The disciplinary acts that ware in the old days will not i mean will not work in today's world. Kids now fight the teachers, fight each other, and bring weapons to school. I thing the discipline act is just fine in the schools. The disciplinary should come from the kids homes and there parents. The reason why kids act up in schools are because there not disciplined at home right. Some effective ways to discipline children that do act out at school is to whoop them; not beat your kids because there is a difference. Parents should do this at a young age so they wouldn't act out.

Robert McClinton